More Than Just Play: The ‘Hidden’ Benefits of Tabletop Games for Children
Updated: 13 hours ago
I come from a family of game lovers. I remember falling asleep on weekends, listening to my parents downstairs raucously playing against my aunts and uncles in various card games from 45’s to Rummy. My immediate family was also big into game nights – as the youngest of five, we’d have epic rounds of Monopoly on rainy days, or evenings playing obscure games like Stop Thief in the 80’s, or ever-popular ones like the classic Clue. Card games and board games were something that our large family could all enjoy together – it was fun, and I remember many nights crying with laughter or arguing with my older brother over his gloating at a decisive win. All were valuable experiences – and that’s what games offer us: a hugely rewarding combination of joy and learning that strengthens both the mind and the heart.
A couple of weeks ago, The Learning Project held a parent education session about the cognitive and social-emotional benefits of tabletop games for children where I shared more about the school’s approach to game integration, how games impact child development, and some suggestions for integration of games at home. Games have long been a core component of a Learning Project education, and that was an intentional decision by staff and faculty well before I joined The LP 15 years ago. In particular, the teaching of chess to all first graders has been a longstanding tradition. As our founder and Head of School of 47 years, Michael McCord, writes:
Playing chess is such an incredibly valuable skill for young children to have—like being able to decode text, or manipulate numbers concepts, or make use of prior knowledge in science or history or art. It is not just another game on our school shelves; it's a game that actually trains children to develop some critical skills. I considered the school’s commitment to teaching and playing chess one of its hallmark – and unique – distinctions.
Here are some of the skills it nurtures and develops when it becomes a regular part of a child’s life:
Cognitive Skills
Cause and effect – Thinking about consequences (of a single move initially, later of a strategy involving several moves)
Sequencing/prioritizing – Holding multiple variables in one’s head at once
High level strategic thinking – Knowing when to sacrifice a piece for the advantage of position
Flexible thinking – Learning how to analyze an ever-changing environment (after each move by one’s opponent)
Focus/time management – Learning to use time well; planning moves while one’s opponent thinks about their move
Self discipline – Learning to hold attention and conduct in good control for the duration of an extended activity
Social/Emotional Skills
Playing by complex rules
Making a win/lose game fun for one’s self and one’s playing partner
Letting a less skilled player have a second chance in the interest of conviviality and of the game
Remaining calm and focused when things go wrong
Always trying one’s best
Having patience
Enjoying a game well played despite the outcome
Respecting and honoring rules
In providing this to our children, we are granting them something both fun and incredibly valuable for them in terms of their growth and development as sensate human beings.
In addition to all LP students learning the mechanics and strategies of chess, all grades also have dedicated ‘games time’ built into their weekly schedules where they have an opportunity to put aside their academics to enjoy a tabletop game together with peers. Whenever kids sit down to play a game, it’s important to recognize that, just like in chess, they are doing far more than moving pieces around a board. They're planning, waiting, cooperating, and practicing self-control, and most of the time they have no idea that it's such a valuable workout for the brain.
In many ways, tabletop games are executive function training in disguise. ‘Executive function’ itself is the umbrella term we use for skills related to planning, organizing , and working memory – often those skills tied so closely to academic success, and, later in life, general success in managing employment obligations, day-to-day logistics and so much more. Take something as simple as checkers. To play well, a child has to think several moves ahead instead of just reacting to the current turn. Then, whenever an opponent makes a surprise move, the board changes, and the plan falls apart. Children are forced to adapt, and sometimes abandon their plan altogether, and create a new one in its place. Executive function in action!
Memory and attention get a workout too. Tracking which cards have been played, remembering whose turn it is, or keeping a running score means holding several pieces of information in mind at once. Staying engaged for a full round builds the kind of focus that carries over into classroom tasks, and matching and sequencing games train kids to spot patterns, which is a foundation for later math and reading development, while exercising similar parts of the brain that are required for following multi-step instructions at school.
And then of course there's the academic content that sneaks in the side door. Counting spaces and dice pips build number sense long before they have an understanding of what ‘number sense’ means; keeping score practices addition, subtraction, and multiplication; and trading or banking in a game like Monopoly, Jr., introduces the basics of value and exchange – real practice for the decisions that children will face later in life. On the language side, word games grow vocabulary and spelling in a low-stakes way; reading cards and rules builds fluency and comprehension; and teaching a game to a friend, or explaining why you made a move, builds verbal expression and reasoning. The opportunities for brain growth are truly endless.
What Games Do for the Heart
Every game comes with an implicit contract – you act, then you stop and let someone else act. For young kids especially, that's genuinely hard; it's asking them to override what is often a natural impulse. Doing it repeatedly, game after game, is practice for impulse control the same way repetition builds any other skill, and honoring this inherent contract teaches some of life's most important lessons. Waiting through other players' turns builds tolerance for delay, which is a core piece of self-control. Following shared rules, even when a rule works against you, builds respect for fairness. Putting up with a slow or distracted turn from another player builds patience with others, and sitting through a full game builds the stamina to stay with a task until it's done.
Games also teach empathy. When a child notices a friend's disappointment or excitement, they're building emotional awareness in real time. When they predict an opponent's next move, they're imagining the game from that player's point of view – perspective-taking in its purest form! And in team-based games, kids learn to combine ideas and support a peer’s turn.
Then there are the meltdowns – a valuable experience in managing struggle. My advice to parents has been to work through these difficult moments rather than avoid them. Losing a round of Candy Land is low-stakes practice for a much bigger life skill: bouncing back from disappointment. Winning well means practicing humility instead of gloating, noticing the effort of the other players, and building a growth mindset from real evidence and experience. Losing well means naming the disappointment instead of swallowing it, separating the outcome from self-worth, and trying again, which is how genuine resilience gets built. Of course, one of the most important things for parents to remember is that modeling behavior is key. Kids are watching how we win and lose, so let them see you do both gracefully.
Equitable Access and Tips for Game Night
Given the immense value of tabletop games on child development, and its alignment with LP program and values, we wanted to create a way for families to have equitable access to such resources. Games can be quite costly, and parents often don’t know which ones are worth the investment. With this in mind, The Learning Project launched this month a Board Game Lending Library so that any family who would like to participate can check a game out from our extensive collection for a week at a time. The initiative has been met with enthusiasm, and we hope will become a longstanding program that will yield wonderful benefits for LP students and families as a whole.
Since announcing the library, several parents have asked for recommendations of games for their family. It’s a challenging question to answer because a game’s appeal is so child-specific. For some students, a certain theme or art style may appeal to them and ‘hook them in.’ For others, they may be motivated by deep strategy and puzzle elements, while others may prefer something shorter and card-based. In general, I’ve provided the following guidance:
Always consider a game’s ‘weight,’ which refers to its general complexity rating. Most games produced today will have information on the box that shares the age range for the game’s target audience, as well as how long an average round will take. The higher the age, and the longer the rounds, generally leads to what is referred to as a ‘heavier’ game – likely not suitable for a kindergarten student. In general, for children in K-2, gravitate toward games that are shorter and practice turn-taking, colors, visual-spacial elements, and early math skills. For those in 3rd and 4th grades, lean toward games that start to incorporate more strategy, deep thinking and cooperation come into play, and older students are quite ready for games that involve careful planning and negotiation, deep strategy and social reasoning. I’m always happy to connect to talk about specific games that might appeal to your child or would allow for them to practice specific skills you’re hoping to target at home!
Some additional tips to consider:
Remember that consistency of play matters more than length. A 20-minute game once a week builds more than one marathon session every other month.
Keep it about the journey, not the win. After the game, talk about specific moments, praise effort and growth, highlight the joy, and don't turn every game into a formal lesson.
Stay adaptable: if a game is dragging, don't push it to the bitter end. Pause it, or tweak the rules to shorten the distance to the finish line. Keep it fun, not a slog.
Make it a ‘no phones zone.’ Establishing a special time to connect as a family, with as little distractions as possible, is part of the modeling process for parents, and creates the conditions for authentic and deep connection.
As a game enthusiast, it’s my hope that LP families can continue to connect around the table in ways that build in both joy and learning, and if there is anything I can do to help, whether by providing additional guidance, explaining game rules, or sharing additional resources, I’m here to help! Wishing you happy gaming in the days ahead.
